When do you feel like your sexiest self? When you're all dolled up, rocking your little black dress and heels and the perfect lipstick? When you've kicked butt at work? When you slip into something silky and slinky? We know how good those all feel, but here's the truth: Getting primped and perfumed — or even showing a little leg — has nothing to do with what makes your guy really want you. Yes, at first a man may be drawn in by come-hither cues — a flash of lace, a glimpse of cleavage. But once his heart is yours for keeps, he has a totally different idea of what makes you alluring.

"When a man is in love, what he finds really attractive is the feeling that he's seeing you for who you truly are," explains REDBOOK Love Network expert Scott Haltzman, M.D., author of The Secrets of Happily Married Women. "To a guy, the makeup, the sexy outfit, it's all a mask. He wants the woman behind the mask. Openness, vulnerability, an air of contentment — those things are what really turns him on."